I love the quote above. This chapter reminded me of this saying, “everything happens for a reason.” I believe things happen in life that are uncontrollable such as natural disasters, loss, and happiness. I don’t know when they come and go, but looking at the situation in a positive light or accepting that it will turn out ok in the end is just the way things are.
As I read the scenario about the vacation in Florida about the weather taking a misfortunate stormy turn, which gave the possibility of acceptance or complaint, I looked at the acceptance role in a whole other way. Sunny skies and a beach would be a wonderful vacation, but if it happens to change, there are still other possibilities to enjoy yourself. They just aren’t what you expect them to be and it may still be what you need.
“Nature makes no judgment. Humans do” (Zander & Zander, 2000, p. 105). The story of the rabbi saying to always thank the Lord just to be on the safe side shows it is difficult to know which good thing is a bad thing in another’s eyes or which bad thing is a good thing to someone else.
Then there was the story of the man who said he had no communication with his son and built up a wall. It was evident that he did not see the possibility of opening himself up to his son.
The story how Jane Goodall just explained what is and had no blame for anything bad that had happened to the animals showed real integrity in character. I do admire someone who fights for a cause with the knowledge of facts. I’m not saying she didn’t have feelings, but to blame someone would be wrong.
My feelings about this chapter were still a little vague mostly because I am one to dwell on the past and ask the question “what if.” Having to accept the way things isn’t something I regularly think about. There are circumstances where that have made me accept the way things are, but not without questioning why first. I guess what I am trying to say that this chapter has taught me is that when I can let things go and accept, more possibilities actually arise. No longer is the questioning holding me back.
Reference:
Zander, R. & Zander, B. (2000). The art of possibility: Transforming professional and personal life. Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Press.
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I remember growing up thinking that there was one perfect person for me in life and the trick was to find that person. Among other problems was that the burden was misplaced on finding someone and all the possible ways that that could go wrong. The alternative would be instead to build something meaningful with those in my life, rather than looking for rescue from some force outside my life. As you mentioned, there were too many crippling "what if"s and not enough focusing on the Now. I love the past. I find wisdom and depth in the past. I don't question the past. I look for opportunities to do better in the Now and into the Future.
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